gone.

my mind feels at times completely absent from my body, like last night i laid in my closet and with the door closed gazed in the darkness...for a while.

I hate this summer. I'm able to take advantage of it as i should...its suppose to be those few months that you don't have to think hard at all, you never write anything, and you just do anything stay up late and get uglier because you don't get any rest...

I been completely raped of mine.

FUCK !

I read the entire day...finished 'Jane Eyre', the most boring book i ever read. It had its moments when it got interesting but it wasn't many. I slowly read through 682 pages. I think it took me a week. It's due back on the 16. I have time to finish up this stupid paper i have to write for it. And all the other random ass assignments that i have to do for the novel analysis.

I have music playing that i'm not really listening to, I guess it's just soothing right now. I have a knife on my desk along with a notebook and a glass...

Don't worry [if you care] i'm not planning anything. The knife i used at like exactly 12 hours ago [1:15p] i was cutting open an apple to see if it was okay to eat. Because this bag of apples had been in this like container on the kitchen table for months and no one knew they were there. I just happened to be sitting at the table and i smelled them...they smelled good. :)

I forgot i had put them there one day while i was cleaning. Upon this discovery i decided i would keep them for myself because i don't eat all day til late at night and i'll eat some popcorn or something. I'm not starving myself, my grandma can't cook well...i don't think she's a real grandma. She only knows how to fry things and make a salad. Today she made fried porkchops and cabbage and rice. I like cabbage and i hadn't ate in a while so i ate this meal. It was koo, i think the cabbage needed a little more seasoning but hot sauce fixed that lol!

Anyways it was okay. My dad out of nowhere said to me i was doing a good job cleaning the kitchen...i just said thanks and then he proceeded to tell me what i needed to do tonight while cleaning the kitchen. And now he's standing behind me blowing his nose.......................

 okay he's gone.

I was on myspace and just happen to look at one of my little sisters pages and this chick has a tattoo on her foot ! she's 14 well 15 today. wtf...how does she have a tat before me? I'm older...

hmmm....i guess it's because i'm the only one who lives with my wannabe young crazed father.

thats a beesh.

`coolbeans.