- im bored out of my flipping wit

- in thirsty and these cheap muthafuckas refuse to buy some water !! >:o

- everyone is getting ready for homecominng = [

- i need somethinng to do . NOW

( anti awesome ]

= |

idr if i`ve blogged since my friend has been here but w/e .

so she`s been here for almost 3 days .

1st day: w.e.

2nd day: thought i would stab er

3rd day: = ] BESTIEE 

lol . but yeaah . 

its hot .

i have a lil but of hw todayy .

MY SISTER IS COMINNG THIS WEEKEND

everyone wannts me to go to homecoming but i donnt want to .

she`s singing "myy band" . i hate that sonng w/ a passion .

im listening to drake = ]

i wannah talk .

jujuan gave me a rose yesterday .. and today = /

its nice and all that but .. nahh ..

he can keep em coming but people are thinking we go outt annd thats simplyy unacceptable .

i want "the highh life"

i wonder if there is a such thinng as "perfect" annd if there is do the people that have it realize that they do .

maybe we have exactly whats perfect for us 

= / or maybe = ]

"im getting high ! ohhh ! and closer to my dreeeaams !!" = DDD

today on the way to fifth period today i saw this boy --

intermission: soo this boyy is this lil bwah that .. UGHH !! idek .

= [

= [

smh . he's ridiculous .

lets jess say TOOOO manny people . people that dont even give a shit about me have said, "erin, shut up !" or "fuck him" or "him !?"

= [

anyways .. lonng story short i saw him walkinng down the hall w/ his arm arouund some chick and havent been able to get him off my minnd ever since .

stoopid huh ?

no ! beyonnd stoopid . like idek .

i hate him !

>:o

anywho ...

my horoscope says i give good advice = ]

i wonder if everone thinnks they're like wise beyonnd their years or is that jess me being ignorant .

lol . but like i thinnk about stuff .

i guess im good at looking at thinngs from other people's point of view .

but maybe its jess all girls that arent completely dummb .

hmm .. but i guess i'll never know because its not like i can compare thoughts w/ other people .

well ; maybe i couuld but theres no way to knows if they're beinng completely honest and youu might embellish here or there to make youurself souund better ...

lol .

i love intellect . i thinnk its like the best thinng = ]

cool . cool . cool .

hmm ; i love when people are like funny and smart but not all "oh did youu know" like they thinnk .  tehe = ]

lala . dude ! whyy is it freaking 8oo degrees in this peace .

is it piece or peace ? = /

random word to the wise: donnt let boyys get iny ouur head . NOT a good look .

im kindah excited to grow up . i wannah skip college . i wannah skip straight to my married w/ children part .  im like excited to have a family and stuff = ]

ahhahaha . i jess realized this entire blog was jess like random thoughts .

i guess thats like what a blog is for . unless youu like have something specific to say or tell someone .

what.the.fuck. i feel like im on smart mode right now .

like "did youu know" type smart .

NOT NOT NOT a good look so ..

ifly,

-- whoaa thats awesomee = D 

<3

pshh

last night i went to sleep around 12 .

then i woke up around 3.45 as i often do . during this time i check my phone and put it on the charger .

so i saw i had a aim from my cousin .

well she`s not really my couusin .

we jess say that ; yuh know ?

i talk to her Alot .

its weird at times because she`s alot older than me .

actually she`s the same age as coolbeansz = ]

well anyway she aimed me like you woke but she aimed me at like 1 .

so i replied like i am now = ]

"you wannah talk ?"

"sure ."

" you wannt me to call you or you sleepy"

"um . im callin youu right now"

so we talked .

lmfaoo !! i swear this bittch and her friends are hilariouus !!

they had me Rolling on some unnecessary type shit = ]

mann ; i love that bitch = ]

so anyway around  5 we got off the phone .

why at like 5.o3 my sister and mama busted in my room like "you still up !?"

i jess happened to have my phone in my hand and my mama was all up in it like who you talking to !? what yall talking bout !? BlahBlahBlah .

i looked at her like she was dummb like can i please have myy life back, please !?

lol .

w.e.

so why like a hour later i awoke to loud as disney music and my lil sister all up on my computer sangin` and thangs .

wtf !?

calmlyy i asked her to turn it down .

she didnt know how so i did it myself .

soon i was back to sleep .

in a few hours i was awaken again by the phonee ringing .

my mama answered it and right when i was about to go back to sleep i heard her like "whats wrong ashley !?( fake name . but "ashley" is my best friend ] -- no . jess put your mom on the phone"

so im like wth !?

but im sleepy so im all like fuck that . i`ll talk to that bitch later .

so around 11 my mama comes in my room and wakes me up or w.e.

she`s looking all serious .

hahaha now that i think about it im surprised i did`nt get scared and try to think if i did something . lol .

but anyway she was like i talked to ashley and her mom and she`s gonnah be staying w/ us for a while .

now you`d prolly think i would get all excited but i didnt .

see she was already stayinng w/ myy otherr friend but .. idk .. she was really feeling it .

= /

but yeah ..

( nothing to sayy ]

mhm .

i talked to myy couusin again this morning = D

lmaoo ; smh .

crazy bitch .

oh yeaah !

coolbeans : i was reading your last blog .

and um .. i dont get it .

at all = /

i`ve been watching LivingSinngle all morning .

im bored .

it looks disgustingg ouutside .

myy room a lil` junkie .

im kindah hungryy .

i sorta feel like readinng a good book .

i need a good laugh .

i have hw but i dont have my textbooks = [

I Wannt To Talk To Someone Intersetinng .

i got nail polish all over my blanket ; tried to take it off and it smeared = /

i need new songs on my iPod .

i needah go work .

im starting to get a headacche .

im HOT in heree ! ughh !

i`d rather be sleeping or watching a good movie .

i wannah go do something Fun and Dangerous and Crazy ...

i wannah talk to this one stoopid lil bwah = [

im feeling all BLAAAAHH !!

w.e. bittch . im done .

                 

signed w/ lots of love ,

-- AWEsomee 

not quite an epiphany...

today has just been kinda reflect mode for me...i'm still "plugged in" or engaged in the activities of this thing called life but ...i was observing.

Today, i told a guy ... that i hated him. it wasn't even in joking tone. it was serious, truthfully i don't but... i like him. i talk to him a lot but i just ... 'loathe' his ignorance. I cursed at him an everything. he still stayed around... i mean i don't like the things he does, like he's so young an he's seting himself up for failure and i try to talk to him and tell him what i think & he just looks at me like.... you're a girl, you don't know ish.

I have a problem.

I was watching this deep behind movie on FX ... american history x... deep.... deep....DEEP. I was like wow, its like idk. I can't explain its like i knew that what happened at the end was gonna happen at some point but i didn't know when.

I've been all kinds of wacked out, and i guess this was something i needed to see. you know everything we say...we might say in the end that we didn't mean it but there's a small percentage of it thats true. so just how i told that guy i hated him....i didn't mean it but i know that i don't like him. Its a lot of things that i see that just makes me angry but i don't say anything. i state my opinion sometimes but not all the time.... because sometimes i come off as an asshole. like this guy Miles that i know. to me... he's an asshole. he states his opinion sarcastically .... more sarcastic than me & it pisses me off. He was wants to be a smart ass and show off his "self-taught education" and he's wrong. UGH, then he had the nerve to call some other people pedantic ! ii couldn't do anything but frown up my face...

[i'm really going off on a super tangent & being random at the same time, please forgive me]

then my sis aka awesome, pointed out to me that it seems like i'm becoming distant from my friends.... the people i called friends for so long. i see it. i don't know why. maybe its my boyfriend. maybe its because i'm really trying to figure and sort some things.... idk.

*my desk is super dirty and cluttered & i read somewhere i can't remember but einstein said, they say a cluttered desk mean a cluttered mind .... so what does an empty desk mean ?.... well it was something like that. I can't remember. 

maybe i just have too much on my mind to even think clearly...i think thats what it is. I can't ever write good papers because my dad says that either i'm not explaining myself enough or he just completely doesn't know what i'm talking about...its un-clear.

i know what i want, but yet i don't.

---------------------------------------------------------

me & a couple people i know always joke about his one girl i know .... we say she's pro -black and stuff. &  I heard her with my own ears say she hates white people. But she always contradicts herself .... saying everything that she thinks would make her look good in our eyes but she still feels the need to yell over you to get her point across.... and it probably wouldn't make sense to you. I can't give you any examples because there's just so many i can't remember. There's this white guy who's like madly in love with her and he hangs around me... I can't stand it because well all he thinks about is her... talks about her... and idk at first i was just cool with her then when i came into her circle i started to "not like" her i try to distant myself from her but its hard. but anyway the guy is totally annoying he will not leave me alone.... i can't have alone time he has to be there and i don't like hugging him. I really don't care for hugging anyway...like today we were walking in the hall.... he felt the need to be walking so close to me that our shoulders were touching... i like my personal space, really i do. Every time i tried to move away it was like he was attached to me . I got EXTREMELY irritated. I hate an attitude ! 

But i know what he's doing.... i told him sense the girl isn't treating him all kinds of wrong he should just forget her and stop talking to her and move on. So, he's trying to fill that space...of where she use to be to him. His problem is he's too clingy like, he has problems with the woman in his life and he's calling me his sister and the only family he has & that he hates his mother. its just crazy. 

I know i'm clingy. but i give people choices when they first meet me. I'm like super nonchalant and not open to them so if they keep talking to me like they really wanna get to know me then i open up. but i guess i'm clingy to an extent. but idk

my brain is going infinity miles an hour.

--coolbeans

yee-uhh = ]

okay ; so for some reason ( idr ] i was looking at muh drafts, right ?

so i remember when i had blogged my heart out but something happened and i could`nt post it .

well ... back then i ha stoopid Mozilla ( ew. ] and now i have amazing Safari ( yay ! ]

interruption: lmfaoo ! why is my ex talking bout some "you know you enjoyed me when you had me"

how bout wtf !? I broke up w/ YOU on MY burfday .. obviously i wasnt enjoying you too much . hahahahhaha ; thats mean . i hope he Never sees this = ]

anyways .. back to the story ..

so yeah i have safari blah blah . so im like hmmm .. maybe i could copy and past the thingy into a new post or w.e. and what do yuh know !! it worked and here we are = ]

now-uh-days im much happier despite the whole school situation .. = /

but lol i was reading it or w.e. and i was like cheesing the whole time = D

ommfg ! tell me whyy my mama is talking bout some i cant wear eyeliner ! 

what.the.fuck.

who.the.fuck.

when.the.fuck.

where.the.fuck.

and how.the.fuck !?

smh ; thats crazyy huh ?

interruption: why is this bwah like "you know you enjoyed that 2 weeks we went out"

omfg ! we deff went out for more than that .

but idk .. but it felt like a LONGG ass time . rofl ! soo many people was like "erin ... seriously ? like fareal ?"

lmaoo .. smhh

he's crazyy ! and a asshole .. and loud .. and ghetto .

smhh ; i ca --

hmm .. not gonnah say that .

= ]

so anyway back to the blogg that i copied or w.e.

... here it is !!

... 

9.17.o8

i feel like screaming and throwing thingss !!!grr !! UGHH !! for the past few days i've been feelig very ... angry/idk/depressed .about 5sec. ago i was ready to kill because i wanted to blog badd ! but i couldnt sign on !! now i feel Reaally dumb because the entire time i was spelling something wrongg . whatever bitch = /i need to do my hw . like 2hrs ago . oh yeahh and im failing >:oeverybody told me "dont fuck up" but its mucho easier said than done . i jess dont (ever] feel like doin this crap . IM FREAKIN FRUSTRATED !!ughh .... = [

Bitch&Moan session :

i lovve my phone .im cold .

i need a new layout .

im hungry .

i dont wannah fail .

all i ever think about is shoppin and im broke as fuck .

im bored .

im jess not happy .and im usually happy for like no reason ; or if im not the saddness only lasts for like a dayy ....wtf dude !?

oh yeah ! hahah . i think these chicks at school hate me because this bwah (used to ?] talk to me .wow . if they only knew what was really goin on they'd prolly laugh like "HAHAHHA ! ERINN ! wtf !? hahhahah !"tehe .i actually cacked a smile .... but within a 2sec it was gone .my daddy took my computer to get all the viruses and stuff taken off and now i have no safari no itunes and everything i download is Gone .so for now im stuck with effn MozillaFirefox . its pretty fast but i keep tryin to download some flashplayer thingy and the shit wount work !!!wannah know somethin cool ?since i started bloggin' that "UGHH !!" feeling went away a wittle . thats good huh ?blahblahblah ...i needah mann ... like seriously ... UGHH !! i wannah go fuckin shopping like ... it jess makes me angry !!like omg !! i saw these boots one E!News and fell in love . then i saw these blazers that i LOVEE on some skateboard shop store online thingy and ... i've jess been seeing alottah crap and its pissin me off !im ready for summer .hmph . actually i was kindah supposed to like spend the summer w/ my cousin kindah sortah gf but ... idek . = /

NOBODY COOL HAS TEXTED OR AIMED ME ALL DAY !! i feel so unloved = [[

= [
= [
i wannah do somethin wildd .uhmm so ; i guess i'll go hit up that hw ....
which is ironic because i jess said i wanted to do something wildd . wow .


adios loveee .




signed ,
not . so . awesomee :/

highschool dropout*

i hate school w/ a passion .

its very hard .

harder than i every thought it would be .

the teachers are assholes beyond reason .

i Really wannah do good and make something of myself but ... 

we`ll have to see about that .

= /

                                                                                                                     -- awesome ? how bout not .